FAIL :(

Nearly passed out a few times yesterday. I am discontinuing my muscle milk experiment. My first meal... was a protein shake. For some reason I woke up this morning after not eating for 22 days and decided that I did not want to eat. I think I am experiencing an inside look at what an anorexic person goes through. All throughout this study I have craved various foods and have said man when I am finished I am going to eat (insert food here). Now, I crave nothing. Maybe I am a mano.

I crave more muscle milk. I do not know if it is because I am upset that I couldn't continue or if it is because I truly am manorexic. Either way, I had just had lunch... broccoli cheese soup. It burnt my mouth. It burnt me as a sign. That I shouldn't be eating. I should probably puke it up, but I won't. As the soup singed my mouth, all I could think about the chilled protein shake that used to slide down the ol' esophagus. Maybe I have a sexual attachment to muscle milk.

The muscle milk I have been drinking is a white powder that I mix with milk. I bet there is cocaine in there. I may go snort some. Maybe this is the inside of a crack addict's head. It smells delicious, it tastes pretty good, I can't stop drinking it. Maybe I am a crack addict.

All I care about right now is drinking protein and lifting weights. I have seen the results. Maybe this is the inside of a meathead's head. I have lost 14 pounds in 22 days. This isn't what is supposed to happen, but I am not hungry and I am losing weight. Maybe I am a meathead.

For some reason I am thinking about this in too much detail. Maybe this is the inside of a scientist's head. Someone who is always asking questions and furthering and reasoning for any action that may occur. Maybe I am a scientist.

Maybe I am gay.

I am either:

1) Manorexic

2) physically and emotionally attached to protein supplements

3) a crack head

4) J&T

5) A scientist

6) Gay

On that list there is an absence of any normality. What if I am never going to feel normal again. Will I eat real food for dinner? I hope so.